Saturday, January 7, 2012

Contented Alone


I was just reading one of my favorite blogs, Cozy Little House and she has a wonderful post on living alone and being contented.  She has come out of a not so good marriage and started life afresh.
She shared a great video of happily married friends and also a wonderful article on how men and women see living alone.  It was very insightful.  If you are living alone, especially after the the end of a relationship, I highly recommend the article.
Even though I prefer not to be totally alone, it is freeing.  I think what I would like sometime in the future is just companionship.  Someone to share conversation and dinner with.  Someone to do fun things with.  It is hard to find someone to do that with  especially when you are 53 as most others are married with children or grandchildren.  It was hard at 30 and all the years in between for the same reason.  I went to a church sponsored singles group for those in their 30's years back.  After about 4 or 5 times I quit because all could see were women grasping to find a man.  The men were way out numbered and I felt sorry for them, it was like dogs fighting over a bone.  No one wanted to be friends first, they were looking for mates, someone to take care of them I guess.  And the women didn't care to become friends with other women.  If they were stuck with only women to talk to all they talked about was their kids, something I could not share in as I have none.  Plus I am pretty reticent about joining in with a company of strangers, better at it now but it is certainly outside my comfort zone.
Living alone is better than living with someone you can't deal with anymore, or in my case someone who keeps leaving of his own accord.  I think the article is right, men need someone to take care of them, someone they can tell what to do and how to do it.  But men need to understand that not all women want to be smothered, we can take care of ourselves just fine and we have a voice that rings loudly through the universe.  We may on occasion want a man but we don't need one, therein lies the difference.

4 comments:

Lord Wellbourne said...

Companionship, conversation, flea-market plundering, crafting in front of PBS, thrift store tomb raiding....sigh....those were good days.

ladyhawthorne said...

I miss them and your company more than you know.

Lord Wellbourne said...

Ditto

Jane said...

Thanks for sharing this... something I needed to read... BTW, love your Egyptian embroidery!

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